I have always wanted a life companion who is pretty much the same as me. A friend, a life partner, or a random acquaintance apart from my family; I don't mind which one as long as I can have someone who I can talk with and nods at everything I say as a sign of agreement. This is the most selfish request I have ever wanted from Allah. I started to feel this conquering desire since I have always been the only odd one in a group or the one who feels outcast seeing everyone talking and well-engaged in a conversation. I don't know if I'm just an emotional brat typing this down here to make senpai notice me or something but I definitely want to have that one person who can be of one mind with me in every single thing. I just need someone who I can smile or laugh with when we agree on something that everyone doesn't find so, someone who can feel together the joys seeing our favourite anime characters, and someone that views the world from the same angle as I do. I don't need a bunch of extroverts flocking around the place with me, I just want one; no matter where she comes from or how bad she used to be in the past. Now, I wonder if a doppelganger really exist? 

This wish of mine is never granted. Since I was in primary school, my closest friends have always been the outgoing ones. The kind that seems to walk and leave me behind if they find a more talkative one in front. The kind that has many interests in everything like me but were rarely on the same point of view. The kind that makes me feel like there's a really short wall between us but never had once give me the urge to overcome the barrier and join their side. 

But, Allah always know what's best for His servant, to begin with. Since I have never had the chance to be acquainted with someone who goes in the same flow with me in life, I always have to face with various kind of people who are running against the flow. This is what helps me grow up. From being someone who nodded and say 'Yes' to everything, I am now able to voice my opinion even though it is against the crowd. The courage to go out from my own group & doing everything without feeling restricted within the group's norms. It really is a good thing to be the 'odd' or the outcast one. Nothing is actually bad even if I'm the most untalkative one. I can feel the freedom. I don't feel scared to do anything I want even if it is disliked by the rest since I am the 'odd' one in the group to begin with. I don't feel like I am being pinned down.

I am grateful with this freedom that Allah has granted upon me. He is the best planner indeed. 

I have always wanted a life companion who is pretty much the same as me. A friend, a life partner, or a random acquaintance apart from my family; I don't mind which one as long as I can have someone who I can talk with and nods at everything I say as a sign of agreement. This is the most selfish request I have ever wanted from Allah. I started to feel this conquering desire since I have always been the only odd one in a group or the one who feels outcast seeing everyone talking and well-engaged in a conversation. I don't know if I'm just an emotional brat typing this down here to make senpai notice me or something but I definitely want to have that one person who can be of one mind with me in every single thing. I just need someone who I can smile or laugh with when we agree on something that everyone doesn't find so, someone who can feel together the joys seeing our favourite anime characters, and someone that views the world from the same angle as I do. I don't need a bunch of extroverts flocking around the place with me, I just want one; no matter where she comes from or how bad she used to be in the past. Now, I wonder if a doppelganger really exist? 

This wish of mine is never granted. Since I was in primary school, my closest friends have always been the outgoing ones. The kind that seems to walk and leave me behind if they find a more talkative one in front. The kind that has many interests in everything like me but were rarely on the same point of view. The kind that makes me feel like there's a really short wall between us but never had once give me the urge to overcome the barrier and join their side. 

But, Allah always know what's best for His servant, to begin with. Since I have never had the chance to be acquainted with someone who goes in the same flow with me in life, I always have to face with various kind of people who are running against the flow. This is what helps me grow up. From being someone who nodded and say 'Yes' to everything, I am now able to voice my opinion even though it is against the crowd. The courage to go out from my own group & doing everything without feeling restricted within the group's norms. It really is a good thing to be the 'odd' or the outcast one. Nothing is actually bad even if I'm the most untalkative one. I can feel the freedom. I don't feel scared to do anything I want even if it is disliked by the rest since I am the 'odd' one in the group to begin with. I don't feel like I am being pinned down.

I am grateful with this freedom that Allah has granted upon me. He is the best planner indeed.